A few years ago, when we began the National Eucharistic Revival, I asked my parishioners a simple question: “Why are YOU Catholics?” So, today as we prepare to celebrate Christmas, I would like to ask you the same question of why you are Catholics and continue to choose to be Catholics…
Even though this question seems simple, it requires a personal response that springs from a life of prayer and worship. Too many times, we take our faith for granted or simply go with the motion without thinking much about why we believe and choose to be faithful even when it gets hard. Too oftentimes, we just say that we are Catholics without thinking much about what it really means and what it really takes in order to believe, abide, remain, and live what we are called to do and be as Christians. If we simply go through the motions and show up because of this or that matter, person, cause, or thing, we will quickly leave when things get hard. If we come to Mass because we like the priest, music, choir, people, or the like, we have come for the wrong reason! If those secondary factors define or affect our real decision and desire to live the faith, we will quickly leave when we do not get what we want and like.
True faith has to go deeper than all that interpersonal, institutional, and even personal likings, desires, wants, and factors, else we idolize someone or something instead of worshipping and being faithful to who we are deep from within. To be honest with you, if the Eucharist is not real, I would not be a Catholic nor remain a priest. I have been hurt, betrayed, backstabbed, bullied, manipulated, and controlled in different ways by children of the Church, even by those who are in positions of power and leadership. If this is simply a human institution or if my faith is simply a choice of my liking or want, I would have walked away a long time ago.
Out of my diocesan ordination class, I am the only one left. Out of my seminary class, only a few of us are left. So many had walked away or were no longer in active ministry due to different factors. Even though I understand their choices and can sympathize with some of their decisions, my heart cannot let go… and so here I still am… as a Catholic and priest. Even though my life is not perfect, it has been full of His grace! If I did not know deep within my heart of hearts that He loves me, I would have walked away, too. It makes no sentimental, emotional, psychological, or personal sense at times, but my heart knows, and it cannot let go of Him. I am a Catholic and a priest because I love Him, even though I am still imperfect and struggle with my own faith.
Each and every one of us will have to make a personal decision to give up lesser goods in order to truly dedicate ourselves and follow Him in our own particular state of life! Faith is not a convenience or a leisure choice. It is not something that we choose when it fits our lifestyle and liking. It is a decision to love and be faithful to Him with a personal and communal way of life, worship, and service! I, as a priest, had to personally make the decision to embrace celibacy as a personal gift to the Lord and His Church.
No one forces me to do this… It is a personal choice so that I can be totally dedicated to the service of His people. Even though I know it is my choice, it does not mean that it is easy, though. Loneliness is real, especially during the holiday season and when I am far away from my family on duty. There are days that I question what my children would look like… but those moments come and go, and it is important that I choose to remain faithful to the choice that I have made for the good of the Church. People often tell me that it must be easy to be by myself with no family, spouse, or children to worry about… so I can go home and be at peace! Of course, the grass will always seem to be greener on the other side, but no one has it all. There must be a personal and sacrificial gift offered to Him as we embark upon the journey of faith and discipleship. Each and every one of us has to make that very personal sacrifice to love Him first and foremost.
Just like celibacy is a personal gift I offer to Him freely, and wholeheartedly out of love for Him and the Church, you must ask yourself what have you personally offered up to Him out of love? Faith is not just a convenient thing to do, something nice to think about, or what we choose to pursue when we are free and have some spare time… Faith requires everything! We will be hurt by others in the Church. We will fail at times. We will doubt. We will lose heart. However, we cannot walk away if our hearts know who we belong to and who loves us! That has to be something so deeply personal, else the external noises, chaos, hurts, and distractions will pull us all over the place and shake our faith in Him. Loving Him is an intimate, heartfelt, and unexplainable choice that must come from our very own understanding of who He is and who we are in His eyes. This is nourished and strengthened through a life of prayer and worship, and at times, too, by how we are loved and cared for by others in the Church who are put in the right place and time to lift us and walk alongside us.
So, please let me ask you again, “Why are YOU a Catholic?” Even though this reflection will be short, I want to invite you to spend time reflecting and praying about this question. If we do not understand and know the Eucharist, we will miss the real reason why it is important to believe and remain faithful to Him when it gets hard. This is a lifelong question we have to go back and constantly reflect on the real reason why we are Catholics. Therefore, please do not stop asking and falling in love with the Lord! Spend time to go out of our way, too, to find opportunities to pray, rest, and spend time with Him through Eucharistic Adoration, Holy Hour, and at Mass. May we experience in our lives that personal love He has for us, hence personally return to Him our genuine love for Him. May the love of Christ change us deep from within, and the love for Christ move us to serve one another.
Wishing you and yours a blessed Christmas.